Aug. 20, 2010

I've been back from my vacation for a week. In some ways it feels like I just returned to town. I loved my time in Idaho. I did many things, all of which I fully enjoyed.

The class reunion was nice. It was great to see so many people I had not seen for many , many years. But in so many ways, it felt just like being at the last one, five years ago. Seeing old friends and childhood friends seemed so empty in ways. We used to know each other so well, had so many things in common. Now, we just seemed like senion citizen strangers who used to relate on many levels, but could not fully experince each others lives anymore. So many values have changed and life's experiences have left all of us with different feelings about our own lives. All of our lives are now filled with our own families, and feelings of inner security, or deep sorrow that we cannot seem to share with these people who are now strangers to us. Three hours spent in a room, over food and songs, and funny stories of old times, cannot rekindle those feelings we shared when our lives were based on such different goals and values. Yet, we are all the same. But the unity was lacking.

I more fully enjoyed the time after the reunion, with Deanna. She and I are more honest with each other, because we know each other, and share family blood and ties. We understand the value of honesty. I don't believe there is anything in the world that can connect people like being real and honest with each other. We all share the same needs and desires and hopes from life.

As usual, I loved my time with Jerrie, and being in her space. I had time there to love nature, and friends, and talk, and feelings, and the opportunity to meet new friends, and share times and happy laughter, food, and fun with them as well. I did try to just relax and take a minute at a time while I was there, and for moments of each day, I felt very relaxed and loved and appreciated.

I took pictures of the cabin, inside and out, and I will make a scrap book section to reflect the feelings I have about that time and space.

I am extremely happy that my colonoscopy is over. I really hate that procedure!

I loved my time with Red Hatters today, and am excited about our newly forming book club.

I have fully enjoyed my time with Gregory for the past week. We are fully back together. He is my joy!!!!

Now I need to get my life back into exercise routines, and regain some of my strengh and agility, and maybe, negate some of my back pain issues. I have to maintain positivity.